I have been reading some of your postings, and am encouraged by some of your statements on marriage and I quote them here.
Life is what happens to you while you're making big plans. Most people place their marriage at the bottom of their list of priorities. Your marriage should come first, friends and family down on the list. By the way, church should come down on the list too. Nothing should be any higher on your list of priorities than your spouse. Only God comes higher, and God wants you to love each other above all else. If you don't, then nothing else really matters. You know, why is it that many people who want a divorce go around quoting Jesus' statement on adultery; but I never hear these people quote Malachi 2:16 where God say he HATES divorce, “For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away.” “Putting away” is the Old Testament term used for divorce
AND I heard a divorced woman quote Malachi 2:14 concerning husbands who deal “treacherously” with their wives; but the context of the Scripture passage is strictly divorce. That is, a husband who divorces his wife is dealing treacherously with her, especially if they've been married for a long time. God HATES divorce! Why don't I ever heard women quoting Jeremiah 3:20... “Surely as a wife treacherously departeth from her husband, so have ye dealt treacherously with me, O house of Israel, saith the LORD.” It is divorce that is treacherous.
I also have some questions of some of the things you say.
You Say: "I sincerely believe many marriages are failing because of the monotony and stress of the workplace." My Thought: This Maybe so but it should not be in thoses that call themselfs Christians. God is our provider, God is our defender, God is our saviour, God is our healer, God is our instructor and teacher.
We are to be thanking Him in and for all things.
And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit; 19Speaking to yourselves in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord; 20Giving thanks always for all things unto God and the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ;
21Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.
1 Thessalonians 5:16
Rejoice evermore. 17Pray without ceasing. 18In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.
Are we operating in the will of God, or outside of his will??? Is He really our provider? Do we trust him and give him thanks in everything?
You Say: "I cannot tell you what to do, for only you can make the decisions that guide your life; BUT if your spouse has left you and is not remarried yet,"
My Thought: (??? marriage is untill death!!!) any marriage to someone else is only adultry.
You Say: "I would suggest that you call her/him and attempt to make things right. I would also suggest that you ask your pastor if he'll go with you to visit your spouse. Only sinful pride causes divorce. There have been many instances of divorced couples actually getting remarried." My Thought: very good advice.
You Say: "It is NEVER right for you to leave and then remarry (because you are the guilty party for leaving). Whoever FILES for divorce is the guilty party (???) (as far as the divorce itself)… If you are truly a victim (???) of divorce (i.e., your spouse abandoned you), then God knows your situation and I believe you are free to remarry after a few years. "
My Thought: Where is the scriptural basis of this "guilty party and innocent victim" thinking? And where is the scriptural time frame of "a few years"???
Hey I like these thoughts you share "Citing Romans 6:14 they cry, "We’re under grace, not law!" Yet they ignore the first half of the same verse which declares, "For sin shall not have dominion over you." "
AND You say: "My purpose in writing this article is to lead anyone who reads it to the conviction that divorce is not an acceptable alternative. To resolve any problem, a person must weigh the alternatives, then discard the unacceptable and pursue the acceptable. Likewise, couples with serious marital problems are finally faced with only two alternatives–resolution of the problems, or else divorce. If Christians will come to unanimous agreement that divorce is not an acceptable alternative, then they can give themselves wholeheartedly to resolving the problems that they are faced with. My earnest prayer and desire is that broken homes might be rebuilt and strengthened, rather than divided and destroyed by divorce. That must begin with the firm conviction that divorce is not an acceptable alternative, especially for Christians."
AND I think What you say here is important:
”But there are two types of prohibitions found in the Greek language. The aorist subjunctive prohibition would be used to forbid a thing beforehand. The present imperative prohibition forbids the continuance of an act already in progress.”
My Thoughts: First scripture: DO NOT ALLOW man to put apart. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder (divorce) Matthew 19:6, Mark 10:9, let none deal treacherously (divorce) against his wife Malachi 2: 14-16, Let not the wife depart from her husband … let not the husband put away (divorce) his wife.. 1Corinthians 7:10, 11.
If I command: "Do not close the door", and you find the door closed, what then? You say I didn't close it so it's not my responsibly to see that it gets opened. But if I say, "Let not the door be closed", that implies you and everyone that heard the command, not only to not close the door, but also to open it if it is closed. We need to be active watchmen. Not allowing men to think they can take apart what God says is not allowed. HOW Can we stop Allowing or let not people to Divorce and Remarry?
1 By being informed about what Marriage really is.
2 By speaking the truth in love because we care about them more than what they might think we care.
3 By not calling people who are in adultery “Husband and Wife” or “Mr. and Mrs. New-Last-name” Just call them by their first names and do not refer to them as husband or wife. Be sure to share the truth of God’s word with them, just do it with love. If someone is headed for hell because of adultery we need to warn them.
4 and By holding people accountable to their word vowed in their first marriage and to God's word.
Well that is enough for now, I will continue to read through your website to get a fuller understanding of your thinking. And I will no doubt have more thoughts.